April 21, 2008

Tired of Me

Have you ever been so insensitive to someone that it makes you sick to your stomach but you don't realize it until it's too late? This leads to that awkward feeling of knowing that you should say 'sorry' knowing full well the other person knows it too but then the apology seems so forced and insincere that you might not say it at all.

It says a lot about us as humans that we have to teach small children to share, that being selfless is not something that comes naturally. It is hard not to be selfish and yet in those rare occasions when I find myself being sensitive to someone else's needs rather than my own, I find more joy than if I were to have gotten what I thought I wanted.

And yet my lack of sensitivity is exhausting.

4 comments:

Nealll said...

have you ever tried to be sensitive and caring towards someone and then have it thrown back in your face? that can suck pretty bad too.

Holly said...

i've seem to acquire a taste for humble pie.
that and my foot.

Matt said...

thanks for the read you two...

nealll- yeah, that does suck but do you think it hurts in a different way or not as long if you didn't try at all? does that make sense?

holly- funny how similar the taste of humility and feet can be.

Nealll said...

yea you are probably right. i guess the thing that really sucks about that is then in the future its harder to do the right thing for fear of being shunned again..